This girl is more easily done than said...
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
zippers are such a cool invention
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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