I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
She even gives head with a lisp.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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