im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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