i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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