we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
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