Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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