sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
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We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
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Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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