Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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