I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
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Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
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I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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