just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
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