He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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