Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize