Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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