I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
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