some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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