Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize