I can text with my tongue
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize