Rock
Scissors
Fuck
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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