i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize