Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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