Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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