The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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