cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize