I must be too annoying 4 u.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
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I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
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I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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