So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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