just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize