I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
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