I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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