I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize