TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
whose parrot is this?
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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