i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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