So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
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