One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
My butt remains clenched, sir.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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