If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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