Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize