I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize