Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
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He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
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I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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