he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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