who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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