I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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