Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize