cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
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I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
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Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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