can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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