I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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