Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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