this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize