unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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