He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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