I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize