is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
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